Why does my mom twist my words?

i was talking to my mom and i was talking to her bout my sister and how she is almost 9 and my mom is teaching her how to give herself baths and i said "Oh well i remember when i started giving myself baths and i had to put on of those hair clips in and it was hard." Then my mom said, "Yeah, well i said i would show you but you said you didn't want me to you wanted to do it yourself." But when i remember clearly that i didn't want to do it buy my mom made me. Than another time i was 8 and my mom told me that i had to start learning how to tie my shoes cause a lot of the shoes had shoelaces (which it's not like that anymore with my sis) and my mom said "No, you wanted to learn." which that i remember clearly i didn't but my mom made me learn.



So why is it that she treats my sis more like a baby and when i tell her she didn't do it that much with me she'll get mad and twist my words around?Why does my mom twist my words?
You're not going to remember everything accurately. You were a kid. Your memory is going to be skewed in your favor.



For instance, take my sister. She has said she remembers my mom doing nothing for her, forcing her to do things, and forcing her to give things up. I actually kept a journal as a child, and my mom has confirmed that she kept a part-time job so we could do activities my sister wanted to do. We gave up ballet/tap because my sister insisted, she wanted soccer. We gave up soccer because she insisted. We gave up piano because she insisted. (My parents didn't want to drive me to something if she wasn't going too, so everything she did I got put into as well.) When asked, I would say I don't care because if I said I wanted to keep doing it she would have pounded the stuffing out of me for forcing them to keep her in it.



When we moved, she threw a complete fit, and didn't want to. My parents tried to involve us in choosing the new house, and she looked at the house we got and threw a fit saying there were too many trees. We COULD have bought the house my brother had in a nearby mountain town, which would have been beautiful and I loved it, but she hated the trees there, so any house that had tree growth in town she didn't like, but since I loved the trees I actually got my way since I didn't get my way with the house in the mountain. Now? She remembers wanting the house in the mountain town and loving the trees around the house we got.



Now some of this is a little bit of out there that she has (she once believed my mom wasn't her mom, but my sister was... she attacked me once for picking up a ketchup bottle because she was being a real wench making our niece say 'may I please have ketchup aunt ___' and unless she said it perfectly she wouldn't give it to her, but what she saw was me attacking her with the ketchup bottle even though she pinned me against the cabinet.) But some of it is we don't remember our childhood exactly. My mom has talked about how her memories of her childhood are different than her sister's (even though they lived in the same house.)



You might not remember your mom saying "I'll teach you" and you yelling at her "NO I can do it myself!" and then when you came to her after her saying "You said you could do it yourself, very rudely, I'm not helping you now." Or "I want to learn to tie my shoes.. mom, mom, mom, mom I want these shoes with the ties please please please please, I promise I'll learn to tie..." you just remember her forcing you to tie your shoes.



Or SHE may remember it differently, like going to the store and saying "do you want these shoes? Well, they're tie... but you can do it, it's not that hard... do you want to?" and coercing you a bit.



In the end... does it matter?Why does my mom twist my words?
My mom does it to, then I argue a bit with her then we change the conversation. Then after a couple minutes I ask her if she remembers what we just talked about 2 minutes ago and she can't remember. So how can she remember 10 years ago when she couldn't remember what we talked about 2 minutes ago? Ya see...all lies. lolWhy does my mom twist my words?
Because moms always want to be right!
My mom does it too, maybe they honestly don't remember.